This should be funny to those of you who know my mother.
Today, as we were crossing over Mt. Hood on our way back from the chalet, she made this completely ridiculous statement:
"Usually I pop in some Rod Stewart or Rolling Stones, and I just fly home."
Rock on, Karen.
27 May 2008
Why, oh why? (Some I.J. Spoilers)
Before I begin with the actual topic of this post, I want to thank the lovely FSG for having my back about the Yumm! bowls (well, delicious bowls in general). If you know her, you know that she only talks when she feels something needs saying, which means that we should all listen to her when she speaks (or types, or whatever). Because she is usually reasonable and right. And it makes me feel like I have spoken something important and true when she agrees with me. Because, as we all know, I do not choose my moments to speak as carefully as she.
By the way, F, I am going to be in town when you are here. YAAAAAY. Perhaps we should get a crew together and have some Dots? Mmmmm. Grilled cheesy goodness.
***
Alright, and now on to more important things, like how I went to see the new Indiana Jones movie last night at the Redmond theater with my sister-in-law. I have been sort of curious about it, but I don't know if I would have made myself see it if it were not for Joy wanting to see it. It has brought up many questions for me. Maybe someone out there can shed light on some, or all, of these mysteries.
1) Why is it that people in Hollywood don't understand that George Lucas can't write? Because if they did understand this simple fact, they wouldn't let him write screenplays anymore. Or, more to the point, they would put him in a home somewhere and let him write to his heart's content, but they wouldn't bother to actually produce anything that he wrote. He stinks on all fronts--dialogue, story and pace. But especially dialogue. There were several moments when Joy and I actually laughed out loud (like the moment, and I'm not ruining anything here for those of you who have not yet seen the film, when "Dr." Jones makes the profound statement that the word for "gold" in Mayan or whatever is also the word for "knowledge". This occurs in the last 30 seconds of the film. Thank you for that. I would have never understood the theme of the film otherwise.). I should note, sadly, that we were often alone in our laughter, which may explain why George Lucas's screenplays do keep getting produced. Of course, we were also in Redmond.
2) Could this movie have been more conservative? (Ok, this is actually a rhetorical question. I am actually telling you that this film could not have been more conservative.) And here is why--first, even though the film ostensibly has a knowledge-is-power message, it actually delivers a strongly Promethean warning. There are several moments toward the end of the film in which the Jones character advocates stepping back from knowledge while the evil Commie Dr. Spalko (poor Cate Blanchett, by the way--she's a great actress, really, but she can't do a Ukrainian accent to save her life) is destroyed in her quest for knowledge. (Oh wait. Haven't I read that story somewhere before? In Genesis?!?) Second, does the film have to end with a wedding? Really? Does the Indiana Jones franchise scream heteronormative closure to everyone but me? Does anyone want Indy married off? NO. It's ridiculous. Not to mention the fact that Lucas is just lamely alluding to the Odyssey at the end of the film. Let me spell it out for you--Karen Allen is his Penelope, Shia LeBeouf his Telemachus, and the fact that he puts his hat on as he is leaving the church is our indication that he has not returned to Ithaca to stay, but rather that he will live to roam the Mediterranean another day. Listen, trying to marry (literally) wanderlust and the nuclear family didn't work for Homer, and it doesn't work for Spielberg/Lucas.
3) Why pay royalties to Elvis's family? I mean, seriously. It can't be cheap to get the rights to play the entirety of "Hound Dog". But if you are going to go to the effort and expense of using it in the opening scene of the film, along with a drag race in the desert, why insult our intelligence by scrawling "Nevada, 1957" across the screen three minutes in? We can't figure it out from the elaborate and expensive context you have just provided? Shame on you, Steven Spielberg, you should know better.
4) What is with the geriatric sequel? This is a trend that I just don't understand. I didn't see the last Rambo (I figured, "why start now?" I've never seen one of those films all the way through.), but I did see Rocky Balboa--in the theater no less--and this Indiana Jones film (and I guess that we should probably also sort of consider Star Wars Episodes I-III). Who is the audience for these films? Is it us? And by us, I mean those of us who are old enough to have grown up with the original films in the franchise. And if so, do we really want to see our favorite characters aged and subjected to lame plots (protecting a legacy and proving your worth to your estranged child)? Is this an attempt to bring new viewers--a younger audience--to the franchise? This seems sort of unlikely. Is Harrison Ford that cool to a 10-year-old?
No, my guess is this: these films are really about Baby Boomers trying to convince all the rest of us that 1) they are ok with aging because 2) they can still kick ass and take names even if 3) they have to take steroids and naps (or finance films themselves) in order to do it. Oh yeah, and they don't mind taking a few on the chin if in the end they still look good. So bring on the "grandpa" jokes, because they'll have the last laugh.
What happened to aging gracefully? I guess I should have expected Sly and Bruce Willis to fight it, but I expected more of Han Solo.
By the way, F, I am going to be in town when you are here. YAAAAAY. Perhaps we should get a crew together and have some Dots? Mmmmm. Grilled cheesy goodness.
***
Alright, and now on to more important things, like how I went to see the new Indiana Jones movie last night at the Redmond theater with my sister-in-law. I have been sort of curious about it, but I don't know if I would have made myself see it if it were not for Joy wanting to see it. It has brought up many questions for me. Maybe someone out there can shed light on some, or all, of these mysteries.
1) Why is it that people in Hollywood don't understand that George Lucas can't write? Because if they did understand this simple fact, they wouldn't let him write screenplays anymore. Or, more to the point, they would put him in a home somewhere and let him write to his heart's content, but they wouldn't bother to actually produce anything that he wrote. He stinks on all fronts--dialogue, story and pace. But especially dialogue. There were several moments when Joy and I actually laughed out loud (like the moment, and I'm not ruining anything here for those of you who have not yet seen the film, when "Dr." Jones makes the profound statement that the word for "gold" in Mayan or whatever is also the word for "knowledge". This occurs in the last 30 seconds of the film. Thank you for that. I would have never understood the theme of the film otherwise.). I should note, sadly, that we were often alone in our laughter, which may explain why George Lucas's screenplays do keep getting produced. Of course, we were also in Redmond.
2) Could this movie have been more conservative? (Ok, this is actually a rhetorical question. I am actually telling you that this film could not have been more conservative.) And here is why--first, even though the film ostensibly has a knowledge-is-power message, it actually delivers a strongly Promethean warning. There are several moments toward the end of the film in which the Jones character advocates stepping back from knowledge while the evil Commie Dr. Spalko (poor Cate Blanchett, by the way--she's a great actress, really, but she can't do a Ukrainian accent to save her life) is destroyed in her quest for knowledge. (Oh wait. Haven't I read that story somewhere before? In Genesis?!?) Second, does the film have to end with a wedding? Really? Does the Indiana Jones franchise scream heteronormative closure to everyone but me? Does anyone want Indy married off? NO. It's ridiculous. Not to mention the fact that Lucas is just lamely alluding to the Odyssey at the end of the film. Let me spell it out for you--Karen Allen is his Penelope, Shia LeBeouf his Telemachus, and the fact that he puts his hat on as he is leaving the church is our indication that he has not returned to Ithaca to stay, but rather that he will live to roam the Mediterranean another day. Listen, trying to marry (literally) wanderlust and the nuclear family didn't work for Homer, and it doesn't work for Spielberg/Lucas.
3) Why pay royalties to Elvis's family? I mean, seriously. It can't be cheap to get the rights to play the entirety of "Hound Dog". But if you are going to go to the effort and expense of using it in the opening scene of the film, along with a drag race in the desert, why insult our intelligence by scrawling "Nevada, 1957" across the screen three minutes in? We can't figure it out from the elaborate and expensive context you have just provided? Shame on you, Steven Spielberg, you should know better.
4) What is with the geriatric sequel? This is a trend that I just don't understand. I didn't see the last Rambo (I figured, "why start now?" I've never seen one of those films all the way through.), but I did see Rocky Balboa--in the theater no less--and this Indiana Jones film (and I guess that we should probably also sort of consider Star Wars Episodes I-III). Who is the audience for these films? Is it us? And by us, I mean those of us who are old enough to have grown up with the original films in the franchise. And if so, do we really want to see our favorite characters aged and subjected to lame plots (protecting a legacy and proving your worth to your estranged child)? Is this an attempt to bring new viewers--a younger audience--to the franchise? This seems sort of unlikely. Is Harrison Ford that cool to a 10-year-old?
No, my guess is this: these films are really about Baby Boomers trying to convince all the rest of us that 1) they are ok with aging because 2) they can still kick ass and take names even if 3) they have to take steroids and naps (or finance films themselves) in order to do it. Oh yeah, and they don't mind taking a few on the chin if in the end they still look good. So bring on the "grandpa" jokes, because they'll have the last laugh.
What happened to aging gracefully? I guess I should have expected Sly and Bruce Willis to fight it, but I expected more of Han Solo.
23 May 2008
"You didn't tell me you were a hippie"
So my dad (known to and loved by most of you as "Bruce") was really excited to take me to this fairly new restaurant chain called "Cafe Yumm!", which has evidently become sort of a phenomenon in the Eugene/Springfield area. There are currently five here, and one in Bend, and one coming to Corvallis. My mom and I were fairly skeptical about this culinary experience, but several hours later I'm starting to fear that Cafe Yumm!'s food is a little like crack in a bowl, covered in Tillamook cheddar. Now that I've picked up the bowl, I might not ever be able to put it back down. (My mother stuck with a turkey sandwich and has not been won over by the Yumm!)
So what is it? You may ask. Well, to quote Monkey James, "I am glad that you've asked that." Yumm! Bowls (the exclamation point is part of the trademark) are bowls of rice with some kind of bean, cheddar, diced tomato, fresh avocado (which I forgo, as I am not a fan of the avocado), sour cream, black olives, cilantro, and some mystery condiment known as "Yumm! sauce." I don't know what "Yumm! sauce IS, exactly, other than that it IS delicious.
So this is a fairly simple concept, but the actual execution is waaaaay better than you could imagine. It shouldn't work, actually, since there are lots of competing flavors. But it is marvelous. I had the "Smoky" bowl which is brown rice and vegetarian chipotle chili and salsa. I also had one of their barbecue tofu skewers.
This is another great reason to move to Eugene.
After dinner we made the traditional pilgrimages to all the Dorsey-related Eugene haunts--my mom's freshman dorm and my dad's seedy basement apartment. We talked about movies they saw (I think all of them in 1970) here, and we tried to find a particular Dairy Queen that my mom remembers (but that seems to be gone now). And, of course, we went up to Hendrick park so that we could pay homage to the corner where we lost Pre (bow your head for a moment of silence and think about what Pre has done for you).
We also went through the university so that we could look at the outside of Mac Court, Hayward Field, and so that my dad could show us where he parks when he comes down for the Oregon boys' basketball tourney every March.
Eugene is a totally charming town. And, for the record, I prefer forest green O's to burnt orange longhorns any day of the week.
So what is it? You may ask. Well, to quote Monkey James, "I am glad that you've asked that." Yumm! Bowls (the exclamation point is part of the trademark) are bowls of rice with some kind of bean, cheddar, diced tomato, fresh avocado (which I forgo, as I am not a fan of the avocado), sour cream, black olives, cilantro, and some mystery condiment known as "Yumm! sauce." I don't know what "Yumm! sauce IS, exactly, other than that it IS delicious.
So this is a fairly simple concept, but the actual execution is waaaaay better than you could imagine. It shouldn't work, actually, since there are lots of competing flavors. But it is marvelous. I had the "Smoky" bowl which is brown rice and vegetarian chipotle chili and salsa. I also had one of their barbecue tofu skewers.
This is another great reason to move to Eugene.
After dinner we made the traditional pilgrimages to all the Dorsey-related Eugene haunts--my mom's freshman dorm and my dad's seedy basement apartment. We talked about movies they saw (I think all of them in 1970) here, and we tried to find a particular Dairy Queen that my mom remembers (but that seems to be gone now). And, of course, we went up to Hendrick park so that we could pay homage to the corner where we lost Pre (bow your head for a moment of silence and think about what Pre has done for you).
We also went through the university so that we could look at the outside of Mac Court, Hayward Field, and so that my dad could show us where he parks when he comes down for the Oregon boys' basketball tourney every March.
Eugene is a totally charming town. And, for the record, I prefer forest green O's to burnt orange longhorns any day of the week.
Feels Like Vacation
I'm having a slightly hard time with the transition from Austin to Portland. It's hard to go from 95 and sunny to 62 and rainy (even if you LOVE the rain, as I do). I went to pick up Mikey for drinks tonight (on Foster--THAT is awesome) and he made fun of the fact that I was wearing flip flops.
The truth is, I didn't even get out of bed for most of the day because every time I tried, I nearly froze. It turns out that the air conditioning was on in the house. On accident. It was seriously cold, but it was also a good excuse for watching back-to-back episodes of Nanny 911 while curled up in a quilt, eating toast with strawberry jam.
Tomorrow I'm heading to Eugene--my dad's there to see a track meet this weekend--and then my parents and I are going to the chalet, and Ryan, Joy and the kids will meet up with us there later in the weekend. Good times.
I brought my niece, the lovely Lady E, two pairs of hello kitty socks (I like to have something in my carry-on to bring her when I get into town). She was really excited about them, and told me that she, "loves hello kitty" and has a new hello kitty toothbrush.
I am so proud.
That's about all the news. If you can even call it that.
The truth is, I didn't even get out of bed for most of the day because every time I tried, I nearly froze. It turns out that the air conditioning was on in the house. On accident. It was seriously cold, but it was also a good excuse for watching back-to-back episodes of Nanny 911 while curled up in a quilt, eating toast with strawberry jam.
Tomorrow I'm heading to Eugene--my dad's there to see a track meet this weekend--and then my parents and I are going to the chalet, and Ryan, Joy and the kids will meet up with us there later in the weekend. Good times.
I brought my niece, the lovely Lady E, two pairs of hello kitty socks (I like to have something in my carry-on to bring her when I get into town). She was really excited about them, and told me that she, "loves hello kitty" and has a new hello kitty toothbrush.
I am so proud.
That's about all the news. If you can even call it that.
19 May 2008
Personal Update (Not for Entertainment, I'm Afraid)
Mike recently pointed out to me that this blog is sort of useless for anyone who might be looking for any kind of personal, newsy sort of information about yours truly. I guess I assume that that is not very interesting to anyone (although I do think that people eating giant hunks of cheese in public is interesting, and many of you have voiced an opinion otherwise on that score. So maybe I don't know best.)
So here is personal news, an update, if you will: I am headed home early tomorrow morning to the City of Roses (just in time for Rose Festival, you'll note. I missed last year for the first time in my entire life. I hope that is a one-time fluke. God knows that I need my yearly fleet week fix.)
My dear ones here in Austin seem to believe that I won't be coming back. That may be true. While I'm in Portland I'm going to look really hard for a job there. I'm tired of being away from gray skies and rocky beaches and mountains and my family. But it may also be that something will work out here in Austin, at least for another year or two, which would be slightly less preferable, but probably more financially responsible. As one hater reminded me--several times last week--Portland is not the easiest place in the world to find employment.
So, for now, things are up in the air. And I mean that. I don't know what happens next. Hopefully, I'll know better in the next few weeks. In the meantime, I appreciate your good wishes and patience. And I will reward those things with a long, long post about Patrick Lunch. It will all be worth it.
So here is personal news, an update, if you will: I am headed home early tomorrow morning to the City of Roses (just in time for Rose Festival, you'll note. I missed last year for the first time in my entire life. I hope that is a one-time fluke. God knows that I need my yearly fleet week fix.)
My dear ones here in Austin seem to believe that I won't be coming back. That may be true. While I'm in Portland I'm going to look really hard for a job there. I'm tired of being away from gray skies and rocky beaches and mountains and my family. But it may also be that something will work out here in Austin, at least for another year or two, which would be slightly less preferable, but probably more financially responsible. As one hater reminded me--several times last week--Portland is not the easiest place in the world to find employment.
So, for now, things are up in the air. And I mean that. I don't know what happens next. Hopefully, I'll know better in the next few weeks. In the meantime, I appreciate your good wishes and patience. And I will reward those things with a long, long post about Patrick Lunch. It will all be worth it.
15 May 2008
I'm Woman Enough
to explain J-Bro's last comment. She sent my brother this you tube clip of scenes from The Notebook set to the the song "Right Here Waiting" and then he sent it to me and to Mikey J. I didn't watch it for awhile, but when I did, it made me cry.
Ok, listen, I'm not proud of that. But the song came out my freshman or sophomore year of high school and it reminds me of being 13 and of dances (because I still went to school dances then--it was before I "graduated" to hanging out at Red Robin after games with friends who drove). And it is a truly emotionally manipulative song to boot.
Also, for the record, I have never seen The Notebook, because I have sort of a policy against films made from NYT bestsellers. It's almost never a good idea. BUT, Ryan Gosling also makes me cry. As J-Bro is well aware, I couldn't even watch the end of Half Nelson because I was so upset and disturbed by it. I saw Lars and the Real Girl 3 times in the theater. But the thing that really gets me is The Believer--in which he plays a self-hating Jewish neo-Nazi. (If you know me well enough you probably understand why this is one of my favorite movies ever.)
Bottom line: I can't take Richard Marx AND Ryan Gosling at the same time.
And, really? Blake actually likes G. E. Smith? For all these years I thought he was being ironic. When we were kids we'd watch SNL and he'd get really excited when they would show G. E. Smith playing on the outros. He'd get even more excited if G. E. Smith was actually in a scene (which would happen every now and again).
God, we are a family of people with really bad taste.
Ok, listen, I'm not proud of that. But the song came out my freshman or sophomore year of high school and it reminds me of being 13 and of dances (because I still went to school dances then--it was before I "graduated" to hanging out at Red Robin after games with friends who drove). And it is a truly emotionally manipulative song to boot.
Also, for the record, I have never seen The Notebook, because I have sort of a policy against films made from NYT bestsellers. It's almost never a good idea. BUT, Ryan Gosling also makes me cry. As J-Bro is well aware, I couldn't even watch the end of Half Nelson because I was so upset and disturbed by it. I saw Lars and the Real Girl 3 times in the theater. But the thing that really gets me is The Believer--in which he plays a self-hating Jewish neo-Nazi. (If you know me well enough you probably understand why this is one of my favorite movies ever.)
Bottom line: I can't take Richard Marx AND Ryan Gosling at the same time.
And, really? Blake actually likes G. E. Smith? For all these years I thought he was being ironic. When we were kids we'd watch SNL and he'd get really excited when they would show G. E. Smith playing on the outros. He'd get even more excited if G. E. Smith was actually in a scene (which would happen every now and again).
God, we are a family of people with really bad taste.
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